Do you ever feel like the wheels are coming off? Hopefully not literally. But in my case, literally, the wheels are coming off. They were a few years ago anyways.
My patient wife, the kids, and I were on our way home from some event or another. We had taken two vehicles that day. She was driving with most of the kids in our not-quite-new minivan and I was following in our no-longer-new Honda Civic. Everyone was cruising along quite nicely until I noticed her slow down and pull over to the side of the road. We were still about 40 minutes from home. Nothing good can come of this. I thought.
I pulled over behind her. She got out. I got out. We told the kids not to get out.
“Something feels odd on the van,” she told me. “Something is shaking.” Shaking vans are rarely a good thing. Not being a mechanic, these sorts of things cause me some stress. “I’ll take a walk around the van and see what I can find,” I told her. I suspected a flat tire. A somewhat easy problem to remedy. But all the tires were inflated. I did a second loop around the van and came upon something most curious. Even without being a mechanic, I was quickly able to deduce what the problem was. You see, most wheels are secured to vans with wheel nuts that tighten on to wheel studs. One of the van wheels was missing about half the wheel nuts. Not only were the nuts missing but the studs were also missing. (Except for me. I was still there. You know…“stud”…never mind.) Perhaps my massive muscles had overtightened the wheel nuts on the last seasonal tire change? Unlikely.
It didn’t seem prudent to drive the family home in a van with a wheel secured by only a few nuts. We had friends that lived about 10 minutes away so I thought we could try to limp the van over there and get it towed later. So we switched vehicles. My patient wife and most of the kids hopped in the Civic while I drove the van (very slowly) to our friends’ place with a couple kids. All was going well until the final turn onto their street. Maybe that turn was just a little too much work for those few studs still holding the wheel on. Because they all snapped and I felt the front of the van drop with a jarring clunk. And we were so close to the target! I got out and sure enough there was a tire leaning over, still precariously supporting the van. The kids I had in the van thought this was quite an exciting adventure! At least my patient wife and most of the kids were enjoying a jolly ‘ol time at our friends’ place just up the road.
I called the tow truck and a few hours later the van was on its way to the mechanic for some TLC. We were all grateful the wheels didn’t fall off driving down the road at a rapid rate! But it was close! Time flies, dad. Make every moment count! Even when the wheels are literally or metaphorically falling off!
Jason Weening drives a giant van with his 10 kids and one wife. Read more of their adventures in his new book, “Yes, Dear…I’m Watching Them,” on Amazon.